She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
