Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
When did angry sex become our thing?
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Randomize