How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
