I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
