I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
