I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize