she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
