wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
