addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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