Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
