the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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