butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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