Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
