How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
