I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
