I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
and she was petting her beer can
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
