That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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