im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
