I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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