Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
You did what with his pubic hair?
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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