I love black thongs
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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