babies were throwing up all over the place
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
