im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
