I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
