Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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