yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I could fuck to npr.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
