I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Randomize
