yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Randomize
