She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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