I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
