David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
