We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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