GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
We are all done wearing pants today
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
