There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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