I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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