your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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