i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
