Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize