Nicole vs. Life
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Randomize
