I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
It's not a walk of shame if you run
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
