By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
