I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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