I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize