That's intense
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
