he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
