Define "chronic" masturbator.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
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