I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize