After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Randomize