and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Ketchup is God's man juice
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
