Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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