Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Randomize
